forces of nature

as far as natural disasters go we are generally pretty lucky here in jersey...the worst we get is a couple feet of snow in the winter...but that isnt even that bad compared to places further north...all that changed last week...we experienced an earthquake and a hurricane!...what?!?

so the earthquake happened last tuesday (i think it was tuesday...haha!)...i was minding my business eating lunch in the caf when i felt the bench i was sitting on start to shake...i thought someone was sitting behind me and moving around a lot....but then i noticed that the table was moving...no way could someone sitting behind me do that...so i started to look around wondering what was going on...the only thing i saw was everyone else looking around with wtf expressions on their faces...haha!...i figured it was nothing so i continued to eat my lunch...when i was done i started to head back to my cube...on the way a saw a lot of people standing outside and thought to myself "hmm...i wonder if they evacuated the building and failed to tell the people in the caf"...but i didnt let that thought stop me from getting in the elevator...oops...haha!...when i got to my floor is when i finally found out it was an earthquake...it really wasnt that bad...it was just really weird...

then saturday night into sunday is when we got hit with hurricane irene...it was a category 1 so it was just a baby hurricane but it was still a hurricane!...during the day on saturday i ventured out to target to get supplies...and by supplies i mean things to keep me entertained while im stuck in the house...haha!...so i got things like this months gq with my future husband mark sanchez on the cover...and season 6 of boy meets world...and something borrowed (the book)...and other fun things like that...i settled in with all my fun new things and waited for the storm...the worst of it happened in the middle of the night while i was sleeping...little sis refused to go to sleep...she thought a tree would fall on her in the middle of the night...haha...anyway...i dont think it was as bad as it could have been but when all was said and done so many people were left without power...and there are a ton of roads that are flooded which makes it hard to get around...but other than that nothing too serious...which is great!

so those are the stories of my first earthquake and first hurricane...i survived!...i hope everyone stayed safe throughout the whole thing!

I go to other concerts too

contrary to popular belief i do go to concerts other than backstreet ones...while its obvious that bsb is my fav i still like a large variety of music and enjoy going to see just about anyone live!...friday night was one of those times when i ventured outside of the usual...

i saw maroon5 and train at pnc with big brother big sis and little sis...gavin degraw was there too but thanks to horrendous traffic little sis and i missed him...we were really bummed about missing him...i think hes great...i fell in love with him the last time i saw him live back in the summer of oh eight at toms river fest...so i was so excited to see him again...but good old parkway traffic held us up and we couldnt make it in time...so sad...

maroon5 came out before train...i am def a fan of maroon5...i knew most of the songs they sang...i never got around to buying their newest album so i didnt know those songs...but they sang a fair amount from the first 2 so i was good to go...i was most excited when they sang "so this is goodbye"...it was half of my solo song in 2007 (the other half was ne-yo "because of you"...they totally dont go together but i liked them both soo who cares!...haha!)...i also love "she will be loved" and "harder to breathe" and "misery" and pretty much everything...i am so easy to please...haha!

when maroon 5 was done there was a break for what seemed like forever...it was during this time that it started raining...but it only lasted a few minutes so its not like i got drenched or anything...it was also during this time that i received some complaints about my little handy dandy blog from big brother...he wasnt diggin all the bsb related entries...i do realize that ive been going a little overboard lately...i want to keep all my readers happy so i will have to find a happy balance that everyone can live with!...sorry big brother!!!...and one more thing...big brother took this picture of my sisters and me...(pretty sure it was taken before the rain...haha!)...little sis' face is kinda washed out because of the flash but that okay...haha!!




train finally came out after what felt like forever...i must admit that i only know about 4 train songs...but this is the second time i saw them live (the first was last sept at union county music fest)...and both times i have been thoroughly entertained...their songs arent overly exciting but there is something about the lead guy that draws me in...maybe i should look into getting one of their albums...does anyone have any recommendations on which one i should get?

overall i had a lot of fun at the concert...but lets face it i have fun at any concert i go to!!! = )

smiles all around!

hey everyone!

i know i havent been around as much lately...i just havent had anything to say...well actually i did write a post last week but i never published it (edit: just published it today 8/29)...it didnt turn out the way i wanted it to...i just kept talking in circles...it was bad...so im gonna try again...totally different topic but lets see how this one turns out...haha!!!

i had an awesome weekend!!!...a few of my friends came dts and we had a lot of fun watching old videos and playing games and laying on the beach and laughing and telling stories and all kinds of good stuff...

the only problem with that is very little sleep was had...i found it extremely tough to wake up this morning...i thought it was just gonna be one of those days that i would be tired and miz...but it turned out not to be so bad...

every morning i around 845 i go to breakfast with sports guy and super genius...today on our way back from the caf we ran into clark kent waiting for the elevator...and then we got on the same elevator...and i gotta admit that my heart was racing a little bit...he was talking to sports guy but of course i didnt say anything...haha!...i was too busy concentrating on finding the right balance between looking in his direction every so often and staring...haha!!!...he is so cute! i cant believe i didnt notice this earlier...whats the matter with me?!...

so this small barely 2 minute encounter with clark kent was enough to change my tired blah mood into a happy one...i know it sounds cheesy but i found myself randomly smiling throughout the day thinking about him...the other day i was ready to throw in the towel and forget about him but i just cant do it...i need to press forward and get on sports guy to introduce me to him and get me a date!!!!...maybe ill text him right now...hmmm...but what do i say?!? oh no, im scared!!! haha!...ill think of something!...

well thats all for now kiddies...wish me luck and i will talk to you later! =)

ps~ i want to wish a very happy birthday to my number 1 all time fav... HOWIE D!!!

update: i sent sports guy a text after i wrote this

me: i should have said this earlier today but i got distracted then i forgot...so before i forget again...i cant believe you didnt introduce me to clark kent this morning! whats the matter with you?! haha!

sports guy: i dont get involved in clark kents luv life anymore

grrr...why does he have to make things so difficult for me?!?...why cant he just set up a date?!?...haha!...i just hope itsnt his way of saying theres no chance he would go on a date with me...ugh...why am i so paranoid?!? haha!!!

one step at a time

its no secret that my biggest desire is to find love...its also no secret that i dont do anything to find it...i think a big part of that is being afraid...i am scared out of my mind of being rejected, being laughed at, being made fun of, all that stuff...maybe im just not ready...let me rephrase that...im def not ready to let my guard down...its a lot easier for me to choose to hang out in the background instead of being pushed there...

i have big problem with getting inside my head...i cant just do things...i have to think about them over and over...and i have to play out every possible scenario in my head...trying to find one where i dont end up looking like a fool...i cant find one...so then i end up not doing anything...all because i psyched myself out...

i have to change my ways...the only way to do it is to take baby steps...if i slowly change then its more likely to stick...i dont really have anything planned out...but i do know that step one has to be self confidence...i have to start believing that i can do it and not be so afraid of the outcome...

so sadly im going to put my quest for a boyfriend on hold...how can i expect someone else to love me if i dont love myself???...i have to get over whatever it is thats holding me back...and then i can truly be happy...

even though im saying im putting this on hold...am i really? how can i put something on hold that ive never actively pursued...ugh...now im talking in circles...so really nothings changing on the bofo front...im not gonna go looking but if sports guy came in one day and said "hey clark kent wants to go on a date with you" i would be like when and where?!? count me in!!!...and thats not any different than before...sooo....i dont even know what im saying anymore....

anyway...i dont know what to do...i feel like im talking jibberish and not making any sence...but long story short is im going to work on improving myself...i want to be the best ashley i can be...and the only way i can get to that point is to take one step at a time...it may take a while but im gonna do it...im going to make some changes and move forward with my life...i can do it!

GOLD is pretty freakin cool too!

last weekend (july 29 and 30) i went to AC and hershey for backstreet boys concert numbers 39 and 40!!!...wow! 40...thats a lot!!!...haha!...the weekend as a whole was amazing!...saw my boys twice...finally met some of my super awesome bsb friends...went on some rollercoaster...drifted away in a lazy river...screamed like a maniac...sang as lound as i could...lost my voice...got little sleep...drove a lot...melted in the extream heat...and had tons and tons of fun!!!

the most exciting part of the whole weekend was when little sis and i got gold vip...it was a last minute decision that im glad little sis convinced me to do!!!

it all started when we met up with laura at our hotel then drove over to hershey park stadium...i didnt realize how how it was outside until we parked, got out of the car, and started walking over to the entrance...we probably walked about 20 feet and i was already sweating buckets...uh oh!...slight panic set in because i didnt want to look like a sweaty mess in my picture with the boys...but what could i do?...at least everyone was in the same boat...

we waited in line forever before and after checking in...apparently there was a problem setting up the stage and we couldnt go into the stadium yet...at least at this point we were in the shade so it wasnt as bad...finally justin said that since it was taking so much time to set up we would meet the boys first and then go over by the stage for soundcheck and q&a...

as soon as he said this little sis and i knew that it ment NO BARRICADES!!!!....ahhhhh!!!...i mean we didnt know for sure but i was 99% confident since thats what we were told happened at the first izod show...our level of excitement rose 10 fold...i was about to stand super close to all 4 backstreet boys with nothing between us...just me and them!...eek!!!

platinums took their pictures first...as soon as the boys came out laura gave me a call and confirmed the no barricades!!!...woot woot!!!...before i knew it platinums were done and the gold line started moving...i always get so nervous at this point...i really shouldnt be because they are just people...but are they really just people?...NO! they are the freakin backstreet boys!!!!

a litttle more time went by and little sis and i were up next...oh boy!...she went fist and it looked like she was chatting with them...they snapped her super cute picture...
and then it was my turn...(im getting a little nervous just thinking about it right now...haha!)...so i handed my bag to q and walked over to the boys...brian was first...i shook his hand and said hello...then he looked at me and said "have we met before??"...this is where i screamed inside my head WHAAAAT!? there is no way that he just said that!!! ahhhhhh!!!...the words that actually came out were: "yeah! i was on the cruise, i was in houston, i was here, i was there, i was everywhere! this is my 40th show!!!"...they were all like 40?! wow!...one of them said you could go on tour with us! (im pretty sure it was howie but i could be wrong)...anyway i shook everyones hands and asked if the could squish in for the picture...so brian was like "squishy squishy!"...howie didnt really listen but its okay...the picture snapped and that was it...my moment was over...
i collected my bag from josh (who asked if i wanted my cinder block back...haha!)...met up with little sis...and then proceeded to the soundcheck area...when we got over there they said we could sit anywhere...so we chose a seat on the aisle cause we know justin mostly pick people on the aisle for the questions...i told little sis that she had to ask one this time because i asked one last time...we took our seats and waited for the rest of the pictures to be taken and the boys to come out on stage...all while being melted by the extreamly hot rays of the sun...man, it was brutal out there!!!

when the boys came out someone had a sign up for just want you to know...excellent choice!...aj saw the sign so thats what they sang!!...for the next song howie wanted to sing i want it that way...boooo!!!...so everyone started yelling noooo!!!...this prompted them to discuss what songs we would want to here...aj made a suggestion and nick yelled back "no aj! they dont want to here that! they want something we dont sing in the show!"...after all the back and forth they ended up singing "i still"...not my fav but its a post chapter 1 song that i havent heard live in 6 years so ill take it!!!...

next was the q&a...my friend laura over at the most awesome bsbcurise blog ever asked the first one...and then justin was over by little sis and i...i said this is it little sis, you gotta do it...but she chickened out...so i raised my hand instead...and by raised i mean threw it up in the air danced around a little made myself noticable...and then it happened again...justin handed me the mic...woot woot!...i wont go into the details...instead you can watch this awesome video that laura took...her question and my question are on there...so enjoy!



after that they answered two more questions and then it was over...aww man...little sis and i went back to the car to sit in the ac for a little bit and cool off...when we turned on the car the temp said 100*...see i wasnt making up the hottness...haha!!!

well thats it folks...thats my gold story...it was followed by my 40th concert whcih also happened to be my 6th and final NKOTBSB show...it was kinda sad to know i wont see it again...

in case you missed it, you can check out my concert review here...and for even more NKOTBSB love head over to my friend chrissy's blog from the first day...her overview is really great...she has the history and a video of every song on the set list...so go on...check it out...you wont be dissapointed...i promise!!!